Humans are social creatures. It is difficult for us to live alone without a friend or a family member to talk to. Conversing with people around us is truly a blessing. We can express our feelings, share our thoughts, and enjoy listening to different points of view. However, we must be mindful of who we surround ourselves with and give our time to. Since the company we keep influences our personality.
Therefore, always try to befriend people who are wise, humble, and an abundant source of inspiration for you. In contrast, try to stay away from individuals who are stubborn, arrogant, and inflexible. Such people are unwilling to entertain new ideas or respect a different perspective. Thus, try your best not to engage in unnecessary arguments with them. It will not only waste your time but also indulging in frequent debates with such individuals will make you appear just as petty, arrogant and inflexible as them. This is the central idea of the quote:
Never argue with a fool, onlookers may not be able to tell the difference.
Where Does The Quote Come From?
The quote is attributed to Mark Twain; however, it is not found in any of his works. The earliest source of this quote can be traced back to the Bible in Proverbs 26:4 and 26:5. The passage delivers the same message as the quote in a different set of words.
Do not answer a fool according to his folly,
Or you will also be like him.
Answer a fool as his folly deserves,
That he not be wise in his own eyesProverbs 26:4 and 26:5
Who Was Mark Twain?
Mark Twain’s name was Samuel Langhorne Clemens. He was born on November 30, 1835. Mark was an intern with a printer, later worked as a typesetter, and contributed articles to his older brother’s newspaper. After that, he worked as a riverboat pilot on the Mississippi River.
Mark got the first significant break of his career in 1865 when his comical story, “The Celebrated Jumping Frog Of Calaveras County,” was published. The story attracted him a lot of recognition, and he befriended eminent political figures, entrepreneurs, and even the royals of Europe.
His most renowned novels include “The Adventures of Tom Sawyer” and its sequel “Adventures of Huckleberry Finn,” which is regarded as the “Great American Novel.” Mark Twain is remembered as the “Greatest Humorist Of The United States Has Produced” and “The father of American Literature.”
What Is The Meaning Of The Quote?
The quote gives us a vital guideline about who to communicate with throughout our day. Spending time with scholars and intelligent people always opens the room to learn new things and gain exciting insights into different subjects. Hence, if you get a chance to converse with such people, never let it go. Ask plenty of questions to enrich your knowledge and better understand their perspective.
Why and how are words so important that they cannot be too often used.
Napoleon Bonaparte
However, avoid arguments, because it has no positive outcome and will make you appear a fool to wise people around you. Try your best to avoid wasting time explaining your point of view to a rigid person. This is because they will not make an effort to listen to or understand you. Instead, they will infuriate you with their nonsensical facts and biased information. It can eventually lead to a heated and fruitless debate, affecting your temper and patience. Moreover, you will lose precious time you could have spent doing something productive.
Arrogance and superiority complex often delude many people into believing they are perfect and know everything. These negative feelings prevent them from accepting new ideas and increasing their knowledge. As a result, when someone introduces new ideas or concepts to them, they reject them entirely without even thinking about them. Moreover, if their loved ones try to explain their views, they become hostile toward them and initiate an argument trying to prove them wrong. Therefore, avoid proving your point if you encounter such folks in your school, workplace, or social circle. Because no matter how hard and sincerely you try to make them understand your perspective, their arrogance would never accept it.
3 Hazards of Engaging in Arguments
1. Its Triggers Anger
It is natural to feel angry when someone is reluctant to understand your perspective and tries to prove you wrong. Engaging in an argument with someone inflexible and arrogant is useless. They will never agree that you are right. Instead, they would try to force their opinions on you and expect you to approve.
When proven wrong, the wise man will correct himself and the ignorant will keep arguing.
Ali ibn Abi Talib
A heated conversation incites anger in both parties and might even lead to personal attacks. Furthermore, a stubborn person would enjoy making you angry and will continue to argue to worsen your temper. Thus, if you feel that the conversation with someone is steering towards an argument, gracefully pull yourself out of such quarrels before it aggravates and brings out the worst in you.
Never wrestle with pigs. You both get dirty and the pig likes it.
2. Fosters Negative Feelings and Grudges
A healthy conversation opens room for learning and understanding different concepts. Plus, it also increases respect between both parties. In contrast, an argument seldom ends on a positive note. It triggers negative emotions, and sows the seed of disrespect and hate among people.
3. Affects Your Personality
Anger has the power to bring out our worst side and stop us from thinking and acting rationally. A furious person often makes a rash decision and hurts people around them. During an argument with unreasonable people, people can quickly become infuriated, raise their voices, or pass hurtful comments. Such actions can tarnish their image among seniors, colleagues, and friends.
How To Have a Healthy Discussion?
A conversation can easily turn into an argument with no fruitful outcome. Thus, opt for a healthy discussion instead of debating or fighting to prove your point. Always try to understand each other and entertain new thoughts by having a civil conversation. The following are 3 tips to help you keep the discussion healthy and enjoy favorable outcomes.
1. Be Humble and Keep an Open Mind
Before initiating a conversation with your friends, colleagues, or any individual, remind yourself that there is always room for learning. Many academically qualified people think of themselves as superior to others and hate to acknowledge the ideas of others. Such a mindset is the biggest hindrance to having healthy discussions.
Hence, always stay humble and remind yourself that you cannot possibly know everything and that sometimes you might be wrong. Humbleness will allow you to learn new things and implement them into your life to make it better.
It is the mark of an educated mind to be able to entertain a thought without accepting it.
2. Stay Calm
A lot of people get irritated when their peers misunderstand them or if they are proven wrong. If you find yourself in such a situation, always maintain patience. Moreover, be mindful of how you speak; avoid raising your voice as it can provoke the other party into responding with anger. Be in control of your emotions and never allow them to get the best of you.
3. Ask Relevant Questions to Understand
Asking questions is an excellent way to clear your queries and increase your knowledge about a subject. During a discussion, never ask irrelevant questions to tease the other party or to test their knowledge. If you have a question, ask it professionally and politely. You must show that you are genuinely interested in understanding more. Refrain from using a mocking or derogatory tone to humiliate your peer in front of everyone.
Learn from yesterday, live for today, hope for tomorrow. The important thing is not to stop questioning.
Albert Einstein